There are a lot of myths about confidence floating around out there that are holding you back. Myths like: confidence is selfish, I shouldn’t have to work hard at confidence, or confidence is just something you’re born with.
Myths like that temp many of us to believe that we’ll never be confident. The truth is, confidence is available to all of us. It’s time we debunk the myths that have been holding you back so you can live a life full of confidence!
Confidence Myth #1: Confidence makes me self-centered
As believers confidence can be a self-centered thing if we aren’t careful. Those of us who have been walking with Christ for any amount of time know that the only true source of unshakable confidence comes from our God.
As humans we are fallible. We will make mistakes, mess up, and disappoint ourselves. Our God on the other hand is perfect. God can do no wrong. His powers and abilities are limitless.
Go confidently wherever God calls you knowing that you have everything you need through Him (2 Peter 1:3, Philippians 4:19).
Truth: Rooting our confidence in God is the antithesis of self-centeredness.
To avoid self-centered confidence shift the locus of your confidence from your talents and abilities to security in God’s power and might. Give God credit for every success big and small. He went before you to pave the path for your victory and He will do it again and again.
Confidence Myth #2: Confidence can be sustained without encouragement
We can’t fail when we place our confidence in God but we can falter if we stray from encouraging community. God created us to need one another (Genesis 2:18, Hebrews 10:24-25). He is the author and creator of encouragement. He designed us to encourage and be encouraged.
Truth: Encouragement is an essential component of confidence.
Find sources of encouragement. Encouraging community will help you sustain confidence on the path God has called you to travel. Ask God for encouragement too. Our creator loves to cheer us on as we do His work! And don’t forget to encourage yourself. Silence your inner critic with words of affirmation and stop limiting beliefs in their tracks by taking every thought captive.
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Confidence Myth #3: Confidence is something you are born with
We were created with a need for encouragement not an endless source of internal confidence. Sure, we might all be born with different abilities, traits, and characteristics but confidence doesn’t necessarily fall into one of those categories.
We all know a person who exudes confidence in everything they do. That person wasn’t born that way. Just like you, they had an upbringing that shaped their mindset, disposition, and beliefs. Don’t fall prey to the idea that confidence is only for those people who appear to be a fountain of fearlessness and exuberance.
Truth: Confidence is something you cultivate.
Don’t give up on confidence just because it doesn’t come naturally to you. The first step in cultivating confidence is often taking a courageous step. Courageous steps have a way of compounding into confidence. When we step out courageously and ask God to go before us we find out that He is capable of doing more than we could ever ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).
Confidence Myth #4: Confidence can be achieved without failure
You weren’t born with an internal source of confidence but you were born to fail from time to time. Failure is part of the human experience.
One of the best ways to cultivate confidence is by trying and failing. We learn something every time we fail. Trial and error can be an excellent path to unshakable confidence because the journey answers many of the unknowns, silences the what-ifs, and grows your competency every step of the way.
Just think about the last time you failed. You might have messed up and wrestled with feelings of embarrassment but no matter the outcome of your failure I’d bet anything you learned something. When we can move past the initial sting of failure (and it absolutely stings!) we can grow our confidence by gleaning wisdom from the process of our failure.
Truth: Secure, abiding confidence often exists because of failure.
Don’t be reckless or foolhardy but take a chance, step out in faith, and trust that God is sovereign enough to redeem and redirect your failures.
Confidence Myth #5: Confidence should come easily
Confidence doesn’t come easy. A tight connection with your creator, life giving encouragement, and lessons learned from failure are all essential ingredients in the recipe for confidence. You have to work at your relationship with God, you have to invest time and energy into the kind of community that can be a life giving source of encouragement, and you have to get out there and put in the hard work of trial and error.
Truth: Confidence requires effort.
Work diligently at the things that sustain your confidence. Make time with God a priority. Find time and space to connect with an encouraging community. And, of course, pencil in a space for a little trial and error.
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Confidence Myth #6: I have to be confident in everything I do
“I would say I’m a pretty confident person but I have my struggles,” ever heard that one before?
Too many of us believe the lie that if we aren’t confident in every category of life we can’t call ourselves confident. The enemy likes to convince us that if we aren’t totally confident in everything we do we have no business owning our confidence and sharing it with others.
Truth: No one is 100% confident in everything they do.
Show up and celebrate your confidence. It’s okay to acknowledge the places where your confidence could use a boost but don’t let those spaces undermine your overall confidence! God’s kingdom needs men and women who are willing to step and say “I don’t have it all figured out but I’m confident that my God does!”
So next time someone asks you if you’re confident give yourself permission to just say yes or I’m working on it!
Which confidence myth have you been hung up on?
I would encourage you to go forth confident that you don’t have to rely on your own abilities, go the journey alone or try and make up for the confidence gene you missed out on.
Your God has created you to do good works and He will sustain you every step of the way. Now that’s a source of confidence that I want to draw off of!
Going forward which confidence myth are you going to work on?
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